Your Friend’s Boyfriend Is Off Limits ... Period

You can feel the hangover through the speaker when the first story hits: a birthday night out ends with a phone ringing that isn’t even the right phone, followed by a frantic stranger who has tracked her device straight to the front of the house. We laugh, we cringe, and we talk about the weird little ways drunk brains try to “help” us, including my own cursed habit of hiding my possessions from myself and turning the next morning into a scavenger hunt.

Then we swing into peak destination-wedding chaos: five days in Mexico, lots of tequila, a cute groomsman, and a dance floor makeout that gets immortalized by a very detailed videographer. It’s funny and sweet and slightly horrifying.

The “Gremlin guidance” turns blunt when a listener asks how to handle having feelings for a friend’s boyfriend. I break down why “they’ve only been together six months” is not a free pass, why trust is hard to rebuild once it’s cracked, and why loyalty matters even when chemistry shows up at the worst time. The gossip gets even heavier with a 23andMe twist that suggests a partner may have a hidden family truth, plus a confession about getting back with an ex who cheated repeatedly and the painful cycle that can keep you stuck.

If you love relationship advice, friend drama, dating ethics, and messy true stories with real takeaways, hit play. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs boundaries, and leave a five-star review, what’s the wildest secret you’ve ever had to sit on?

Have your own Gremlin Story? Need Gremlin Guidance? Have a juicy piece of Gremlin Gossip? Email us at EMILYTOGREMILYPOD@GMAIL.COM

Transcript

Welcome And Drink Of The Week

SPEAKER_00 0:12

Okay, cheers guys. Emily, Emily to Gremily here with another solo episode. I want to welcome any new listeners and welcome back, all returning listeners. Thanks for tuning in. The episode drink of the week. I'm still a little, I don't know if scared is the right word, um, concerned. I I'm just like, I'm trying to stay away from like hard alcohol, just given the experience I had a week ago, two weeks ago. I don't know. Time blends for me. So I decided that white wine would be my best choice for today. But I do want to make like a martini soon or a I don't know. I just I need to I need to just rip the band-aid off and like I'm able to have a cocktail and not have it ruin my life. So I need to just make a cocktail. I don't know why I'm like terrified to like have a drink on this podcast ever since it made me a friggin' mushmouth like two episodes ago. Anyway, I I digress. Episode drink of the week is white wine. I figured it would be a safe choice. It's a happy choice. It usually loosens me up, so it should be a good episode. And for this episode, I do need a little loosening up because I had a couple submissions that I questioned if they were rage bait. For my own peace of mind, they are. Because what are y'all doing? Y'all, where am I from? Does wine make me southern? Um, anyway, yeah, just we'll get to it when we get to it. But yeah, I needed the wine to loosen up and to be able to talk about this episode without getting overly enraged. So we'll just leave it at that and then let's get into the episode.

Birthday Phone Swap Nightmare

SPEAKER_00 2:00

Okay, first up we have Gremlin stories. Our first submission is from Sonny. And Sonny says, I have a pretty funny Gremlin story. I'm not a huge go out and drink kind of girl, but I always go balls out on my birthday. By the way, balls out is like a funny ass phrase. I'm gonna start saying that. This year was no exception. I have my core group of about five people, and we have our favorite bar we go to and dance. Nothing eventful really happened that night. It's a bit blurry, but I do remember making friends with a couple girls in the bathroom, as us girls usually do when we're drunk in a public restroom. The night wasn't the gremlin part, it was the next morning. I wake up to the sound of my phone blaring a strange sound over and over again. My head is pounding, and when I look at the phone, I realize it's not mine. The alarm was the phone ringing. I answer it, and it's a girl frantic on the other end explaining, I have her phone, and she thinks she has mine. I'm still half asleep and 100% hung over. So I'm trying to understand. And then she tells me she's tracked her phone and she thinks she's in front of my house. So I stumble outside and into the terrible sunlight to see a girl who looks worse than I do, and we switch phones. It turns out sorry, okay, that tickled me. I've read this already, I've read them all already, but some points just like really tickle me.

unknown 3:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 3:39

Turns out she was one of the girls I became friends with in the bathroom, and at some point we accidentally grabbed each other's phones thinking they were our own. Luckily, she did all the work worrying and tracking her phone to make the switch, and I ended up just staying in bed for the rest of the day. Pretty fun birthday. Sunny. Okay. It just tickled me. You saw her outside and she looked worse than you do. Because I like, I think we've all had that moment where we wake up and we're just like probably we're hungover for sure, but still kind of drunk from the festivities the night before, and

Why I Hide My Stuff Drunk

SPEAKER_00 4:20

you look like freaking golem crawling out of a cave. It's just, it's it's a sad sight to see. And you know, I feel like I've been the girl freaking out before because I luckily I haven't gotten to this point in a long time, but when I hit that point of no return, I have a very weird drunk habit that I do, and I don't know why I do it. There has been no explanation. I can't figure it out like in my head. I can't like therapise myself and figure out why I do this. I really love to hide my own possessions from myself. I'm not stealing somebody else's stuff and hiding it. No, no, no. I hide my own things from myself. I don't know if I think I am putting it away safely or I'm hiding it so I don't lose it. But then the next morning comes around, I wake up and then I can't find my shit. Like I I've done this with my phone, I've done it with a whole ass purse, I've done it with my wallet or my credit cards or my ID. It's just, it's really, it's really inconvenient. And I I don't know why I do it. And there is one specific time. I mean, I've done it so many times, so this is just one out of millions. But I woke up in the morning and I couldn't find the purse I had the night before. I had my phone with me, thank God, but it was just like a little clutch purse, and I couldn't find it. And I was like, crap, like, did I leave it somewhere? And I was like, no, like I I don't think I left it because it had my keys in it, and I made it inside the house. So I opened the door for myself. So I'm like, it's here somewhere in the house. I just don't know where. And I finally was just I kind of gave up on it because I was feeling icky, but I had stuff to do that day. So I was just like, you know what, whatever. Luckily, it's not my main purse. I'll just move on. And I checked my credit cards and there were no weird charges. So I I was just like, it's gotta be here in the house somewhere. I just don't know where. It's gonna turn up in a really weird place. I had to do something that day, so I went to my hall closet where I keep all my jackets to grab a jacket to put on to go run whatever errand I had to run. And there I see it just in the corner. Like it, there's no rhyme or reason for it. It's in this corner that had like I have like boxes stacked in there, just like of like items I rarely use, kind of like like my personal steamer, you know, it's stuff like that. And it was sitting on top of one of those boxes in the very back corner. And I just looked at it and I opened it up, everything was in there, and I was like, why did I come in the closet? And I would have had to kind of crawl towards the back to put it there. I crawled into the closet, put it down there, closed it up, and then tucked myself into bed. I don't understand it. And I've done it with my phone too, and I it's just there's nothing worse than losing your possessions after a night out, and then you have to do like a scavenger hunt trying to figure out and retrace your steps and figure out like where you were, who has what, this and that. It's just there's nothing worse. It's like one of my least favorite traits of myself when I get drunk. Actually, I don't know, there's probably worse traits of mine, but it there it's the one that really inconveniences me personally. I hate it when I do that, I can't stand it. And I really sympathize with this girl who was tracking her phone to your house, and luckily she had yours. Like, good on her. I hope she's well. I hope everything in her life is working out for her, and um, she hasn't done that since. And it seemed you said you're not a huge go out and drink kind of girl. So seems like this is like a once-in-a-year occasion. So hopefully next year you don't lose your phone and happy belated birthday. Okay, so let's go on to the next one.

Destination Wedding Makeout Chaos

SPEAKER_00 8:29

The next one is from Wendy. And I love this story, Wendy. So thank you for submitting it. Wendy says, This is honestly my craziest story, and I couldn't be prouder. My best friend got married last summer in a beautiful destination wedding in Mexico. It was a five-day extravaganza filled with family, love, and lots of tequila. That's a good day. We have been best friends since kindergarten, and since we are both only children, we became each other's sisters, and our parents became super close, so naturally everyone was invited to the wedding. I'm only laughing because I know what's about to happen. Okay. The days leading up to the wedding were amazing. We all laughed, shared stories of the bride and groom, mingled, and drank. This was the first time I was meeting some of the groomsmen since they lived on the other side of the country. I was becoming especially flirty with one groomsman, and he was cute when I was sober, but he was damn fine after a few tequila shots. I love you, Wendy. So the day of the wedding arrives, the ceremony is beautiful, and it was amazing to see my best friend marry her true soulmate. But after all the sappiness of the day, we were ready to rage that night. The reception was wild. I've been known to be a wild child, but none of the parents have actually seen it with their own eyes. But Gremlin Me didn't seem to care that all the adults I love and respect were around, and I ended up grinding and then sloppily making out with the cute groomsman on the dance floor. And thanks to a very detailed videographer, it was all captured and will be seen by my future nieces and nephews. But I had an amazing time and a pretty cool story. So let's cheers to the drunken makeouts. We should all be doing it more often. Wendy. You know what? Let's let us cheers to drunken makeouts because they are so much fun. Aww, I haven't done that in so long. Okay, Wendy, I think you're my spirit animal. I absolutely love that you just you gave zero fucks. You were gonna get your groove on. I'm assuming you didn't sleep with the guy because your parents were there. I assume. I maybe that's an incorrect assumption. I mean, I I don't know how wild you get, but yeah. And yeah, drunken makeouts, we all really should be doing them more often. But if you're single, you should be doing them more often. And if you're in a relationship, you should only be doing them with your partner. Let's make that clear. I'm not trying to promote anything over here, which leads

Ethical Dilemma With Friend’s Boyfriend

SPEAKER_00 11:10

me to Gremlin Guidance and our first piece of what I am going to assume is Rage Bait. This anonymous submission says, I was hoping you could help me with an ethical dilemma. I have a friend who recently started dating this guy, and after meeting him, I think I like him. And I think he likes me too. They haven't been dating for a long time, only about six months. So I don't think they're too serious. I'm wondering, what do you think would be the best way to talk to her about the feelings I have? Or do you think I should talk to him first? Anonymous. Okay. Let's say this isn't Rage Bait and this is like a legit question. I don't want to be rude to any of my listeners, and I appreciate every single person who takes the time to email me, submit their story, their question, their gossip. I like I am just very appreciative of the community that is being built around this podcast. That being said, are you fucking crazy? I I I don't I don't like this. I don't like this situation. I for oh okay, I gotta dissect it like sentence by sentence just to uh be nice and also get my point across. Okay, so you met the guy and you think he likes you too. Um okay, I I can't say this without it sounding bitchy. You on it you sound like a pick me, and I can't I can't like that. That is literally one of my biggest pet peeves about just people in general. I'm not even gonna generalize it to just like girls and women, just like the anyone can be a pick me, and this drives me up a wall. It's like nails on a chalkboard, it's giving Sheena Shay, and if you know, you know. This is driving me nuts. And they've been together for six months. You're saying it's only six months, and I'm saying six months is a decent amount of time, and even if it had only been one month, that is your friend, and that is the guy she is dating. So you that he should be a hundred percent completely off limits to you just based on that fact alone. And like, even if they aren't serious, like why would you you obviously don't think highly enough of this girl to care about the friendship that you have with her over your possible feelings for this random guy that you just met. Like, I I just I can't I can't condone this behavior. It's like if you were my friend, you wouldn't be my friend. I if you came to me and said this to me, I wouldn't trust you ever again. I wouldn't want to bring you around anyone I'm dating. I I wouldn't want you in my life at all. I wouldn't want you knowing details about my life because I don't trust you or your intentions. I think you need to re-evaluate your relationship with this girl because if you're willing to do this to her, I don't think you guys are as good of friends as you're saying, or who knows, maybe she thinks you're a better friend to her than you are, or maybe you think this is just a very flippant friendship, but this is not something that friends would do. So you said, I'm wondering what you think would be the best way to talk to her about the feelings I have. I don't think you should. I think you need to keep your feelings to yourself. And do you do I think you should talk to him first? No, I think you need to keep your feelings to yourself, and I do I don't I don't like this. I had a hard time including this one in my outline because I was trying to think of a nice way I could get my point across. And this is the nicest way I'm going to get my point across. Because I don't want to alienate any listeners. I just I just this is goes against everything I stand for and believe in. You don't go after the partner of your friend. Whether they've been dating for a month, six months, a year, ten years, whatever. It's just like you just don't do that. It's very unique circumstances where this works. For example, Vanderpump Rules, it's an incestuous bunch, and they made it work, but they're also on a TV show, and you you are not. You're just you're living your life. And I don't know if you think you're like in a rom-com, and there is a movie, it just came to me right now, and I'm blanking on the name. It's with Kate Hudson and Jennifer Goodwin, and they're best friends, and then Jennifer Goodwin ends up sleeping with Kate Hudson's fiance. I forget the name of it. I watched that movie, I hated that movie. I it just like that, it's just I don't I don't like it. There's no other way for me to say this other than I don't like this. I don't think and also like you just met this guy, you don't know what your feelings are. Are you really willing to risk the friendship that you have supposedly with this girl for a possibility of maybe this guy likes you? I with all due respect, please stop it. That the this is that's about as much guidance as I can give. Let's have some wine because oh my lord.

23andMe Results

SPEAKER_00 16:23

Okay, and we're gonna move on to gossip now because I need some gossip in my life. Some good gossip. Oh, and I I just remembered what my gossips are. Okay, let's go. Okay, um, the first one is Anonymous. Ay, ay, aye, okay. I set myself up on this episode, didn't I? Okay. Anonymous says, I'm in a bit of a conundrum and I haven't said anything yet. A bit of backstory. I've been with my boyfriend for a few years and we live together. We have met each other's families, and I love his parents as if they were my own. For this past holiday, we spent it with my family, and my sister gave us a joint gift of 23andMe, the DNA testing site to find out the percentage of your ancestry. My sister told me she did hers and it was fascinating. Her and I have different fathers, so hers would have been different than my own. We thought it was a fun gift and have recently received our results, and I opted in for both of us to be linked with family members who have also taken the test. I, of course, was linked with my sister, and I found my aunts and a few cousins logged in as well. When I looked at my boyfriend's results, they were all over the place. The family he has listed is completely unknown. The last names are names I've never heard. It's like a completely different family. I have a weird sinking feeling that it's possible he was adopted and his parents never told him. I haven't said anything to him yet. We are 27 years old and it's such a long-standing lie. I've been debating on talking to him or talking with his parents first. I'll need to make a decision soon because keeping this to myself has been absolutely torturous. Anonymous. I'm very I'm I am so grateful and thankful that this is not a guidance because I don't want to guide you on what you should be doing, who you should be talking to. Thank you for just giving me the information and letting me sit with it. I don't know. I I would yeah, I wouldn't know what to do because that's hard. Like, do you want to be the one to tell him this life-altering information, or do you want to go to his parents to let them explain what's going on? But then also, like, would he be mad that you didn't tell him when you found out? I don't know. See, if I were in your position, this is what would be happening, which I'm sure is happening to you right now. Like you're spiraling as I am currently at the moment. I don't, yeah. You know, I've never done one of these ancestry things. I have wanted to, like, for the most part, I know my family history. Kind of. Um, but like I know, like for the most part, like what my ancestry is. Like, I know I'm Italian. I know I'm, you know, Irish, this and that. I mean, you could tell I'm Irish by my last name. But, you know, I know, like, for the most part where my heritage is from. But in the same breath, I don't know my dad's side of the family. So who knows what the hell's going on over there. And also that this would be my fear is finding other people that I don't know. Like, I I I got enough problems with the people I know. I don't know if I want to invite more problems with new people. My voice cracked when I said that because I'm thinking about it. But um, yeah, I haven't done one of these. I I still am somewhat interested in it, just based off of my nosy like you guys know I'm a nosy ass person. I'm no, of course, nosy about my own family, but I haven't ripped that band-aid off yet because I'm afraid of something like this happening. So uh yeah, um, an anonymous, I I guess let me let me know what happens. I don't know. I don't know what you should do. I I don't know how to do it. If you were my friend, I would just support whatever your decision was. I wouldn't know how to how to help you through this. I would just wait for the updates, I guess. I don't know. Yeeshk, oh, I'm almost out of my glass of wine. I might have to cut this and go get more. Okay, I went and got more wine. We can keep moving on safely.

Secretly Back With A Cheater

SPEAKER_00 20:58

The next submission of gossip is also from Anonymous and also why I needed some more wine. Anonymous says, I'm going to tell you this because if I tell anyone else, they will kill me. I got back together with my ex-boyfriend. If I tell my friends, they probably won't talk to me, and my family would probably disown me. He has cheated on me several times in the past and was recently in jail for a minor offense. We haven't dated for about a year, and I feel he has really changed, and I see so many positives in him now. But everyone else just remembers the hurt he has caused me, so I don't think they will welcome him back. It does feel good to tell someone though. Anonymous. Anonymous. I want to hold your hand while I say this. Please run away from him. Like, oh my god. Look, I'm it's gonna make me sound bad. I'm not against people who have been arrested or Gone to jail because we've all gone through that phase in our life at some point or another. I'll just leave it at that. Um, so that isn't my issue, is whatever you said it's a minor offense. I'm I'm gonna, in my head, for my own peace of mind, say it was you know, unpaid parking tickets, and that was his jail time offense. Um, my issue is he's cheated on me several times in the past. Why do you want to it's like you're setting yourself up for heartbreak and hurt? And I look, I understand. I have been that person. I think all I think actually, look, look, I think this is a universal experience. I don't think this is a unique situation. I think at some point in all of our lives, we all go through a phase where we go back to a person that has consistently hurt us multiple times, whether it be cheating, whether it be abuse. Like there's just there's so many ways a person can be hurt within the relationship. And we have all gone back to that person knowing that they're capable of hurting us, knowing how we have felt so low while we're with them, yet we go back out of just like pure hope that it will change. And it might change for like a moment, but then it just goes back to the same cycle. And I honestly believe that it's because they're like that's not meant to be your person. Like, you like you we don't click with every single person because they're not our person. For okay, I'll l like let me just give myself as an example, just so I don't like offend. My ex-fiance, we were very like we were very much like oil and water in the beginning. We were solid, you would think we were the most in-love couple, but in looking back on it, it's because he was love bombing me. And I was 19 years old and frankly, stupid. Because when you're 19 years old and an older man, because he was older than me, was giving me attention, I was just goo-goo-gaga over this guy and like, oh my god, like he loves me, I must be the best, this and that, blah blah blah. Like, I was attending dumb bitch university because I had rose-colored glasses on, and not long after we were together is when shit started to fall apart. Like, we got together in March, and I remember like on my birthday in August, there was this huge incident, and it's like I saw who he really was. It was it's it's a story for a different day, but it was terrifying. Anyway, I saw who he really was and what he was capable of, but then I gave the excuses for it, and I was like, Oh, but no, it's okay. Like, you know, he just had a bad day, this and that. And then I stayed with the guy for multiple years, and then there were multiple occurrences of him doing something terrible, and then I would go to my friends and tell them, Oh my god, he did this, and I would cry to them, and I would be like, I can't believe it. What should I do? And they were all like, You should leave him. And then a couple days would pass and I'd be like, Oh, he didn't mean it. We're so in love, blah, blah, blah. You, I'm sure my friends thought I was insufferable because it's insufferable to watch someone you love and care about keep putting themselves in a shitty situation over and over again. It's like, what did they say? It's a common phrase, it's like a crazy person keeps putting themselves in the same situation thinking they're gonna get different results. It's something I I'm totally butchering that, so don't hold me to it. But you think you're gonna get something different and you just don't because you guys aren't meant to be together. And the reason why your friends and family aren't going to be happy that you guys are back together is because they know what he's capable of. They've seen you at your lowest while you've been with him, and they don't want you to keep putting yourself in this same situation. It's a cycle, it's a sickening cycle that's just goes over and over and over again until finally we wake up and we're like, wait, hold on. Like, this is ridiculous. I need to get out. So you're not asking me for guidance. I understand that, but I'm going to give you some guidance anyway. In that I think you need to stay broken up. I think you need to put some distance between yourself and him. I think you need to focus on yourself. I really want you to, like, if anything, put yourself in like your best friend's shoes. If this was happening to your best friend and she was accepting this kind of behavior and treatment and tolerating it, how would you feel? That's all I'm gonna leave you with. Because I don't think you would be cool with your best friend being in a relationship where she feels sad. That's what we're gonna end the episode with. Oh my god. Um, yeah, rage bait and sadness is apparently this episode. And wine. I haven't cut an episode to fill up a drink since like I've had somebody on the podcast. Because basic usually I just leave my drink here to sit here and, you know, dilute with ice, and then I end up drinking it after I'm done filming. But I think I needed it this this week. And you know what? Wine feels like a safe option because I don't feel like I'm gonna fall over. I feel a little warm, but I feel fine. Okay.

Social Updates And Listener Submissions

SPEAKER_00 27:41

We gotta end this episode on a happy note. We can't end with sad advice. So let me tell you guys this. I updated the TikTok. The freaking TikTok, the bane of my existence. No, it's not the bane, it's not the bane of my existence because I do want to grow on it. It was just like, I don't know why it's easy for me to post on Instagram, but not easy for me to post on TikTok. Like it, it's the same format. I'm acting like it's like brand new technology and I just can't like get a handle on it. I can. It's just I don't I don't know. My brain is mush. But I updated the TikTok. So if you guys would like to follow me on Instagram or TikTok, you may do so because they are both fully updated and there will be more content coming your way. You can follow me at Emily to Gremlin Pod on Instagram and TikTok. You can also watch this episode and almost all the past episodes on YouTube at Emily to Gremlypod on YouTube. If you have your own Gremlin story, you need Gremlin guidance. I promise I'll try to be nice, or you have a juicy piece of Gremlin gossip, you may email that into the podcast at Emily to Gremlied Pod at gmail.com, or you can message or DM me on social media, whichever. I check both daily. A call to action that I'm saying at the end of I think every episode from now on. If you have any episode themes or topic suggestions that you would like me to cover, or you have guest suggestions, or you yourself want to be a guest, you can email your submissions in at mgremlaypod at gmail.com or again DM or message me on socials, whichever you prefer. I do actually have a list of topic suggestions that you guys have submitted. I'm just kind of debating like the order in which I want to do it. Maybe I'll put a poll out to you guys to see like what you guys want to hear about first or what would be like the most exciting to hear, what would be the most interesting. So I think that's what I'll do. I'm gonna put a poll out to you guys. So look out for it. And that is our episode. Make sure to like, follow, share, subscribe, rate five stars, do all the things so this podcast can be uber successful and reach the masses. We're gonna cheers out with our second glass of wine. So cheers to you, cheers to me, and cheers to Wendy and all the drunken makeouts we should be having. Cheers. Bye!